Ash: The chosen nudist
by The Cowardly Christian
Summary: What if the criminals of the world weren't jokes? What if guns were a thing? What if ash was forced to go naked for his entire journey? What if certain girls were forced to go likewise? How will this world pan out?...probably badly. Aura! Ash. Harem.


**Ash: The chosen nudist**

I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!

...III...

**ANNOUNCEMENT!**

**I'M GETTING A BOOK PUBLISHED!**

**SUMMARY:**  
**On the 13th day of the 13th month of the 13th year...magic will return to the world...and the streets will run red with the blood of the (semi)innocent...unless the world is saved by the most unlikely of hero's...baking cupcakes?!**

**The title is '13/13/13' and it'll be coming to a bookstore or E-Book site near you! Xilbris is the publisher, also available at Amazon, Inkitt and BarnesandNoble.**

...III...

A 8 year old ash Ketchum grumbled as he walked home, once again Gary showed him up! Why couldn't that jerk just admit he was more awesome than him!? After all, he was going to be a pokemon master one day!

As he walked down the winding road he saw an old man in a caravan grasping at his tea...and making it float in mid-air!?

"Hey, awesome! How'd you do that mister?"

The old man chuckled, "Why I'm a master of Aura, my good boy."

Ash looked puzzled, "Aura? What's that?" "Aura is a power one can use to do all sorts of wonderful things...like be a better pokemon trainer for instance."

Ash's eye's lit up, "Really? I want to learn Aura too!"

The old man shrugs, "Alright, but it'll cost you." Ash quickly rummaged in his pockets, "Uh, okay...(counts it up in his hand)...I have 2 dollars and 85 cents."

The old man shook his head, "Money doesn't interest me...tell you what? Give me something you consider worthless now in addition to accepting a gift and giveing it to others...and then we'll call it even."

Ash frowned at the weird request...but shrugged, "Okay...it's a deal I guess."

The old man smirked, "Good, follow the instructions on this pamphlet and you'll be on your way!" He hands the pamphlet to him, "And now my payment-

Ash was briefly enveloped in a glow, "Hey, what just happened?"" Asked Ash startled...but the old man and the caravan had vanished...

...

Slenderman tore off the old man disguise as he watched a bewildered yet excited Ash walk away... **"̵̹̗̼̠̹̂́̀̿͒̅̈͘Ĺ̸̙̿̒̓e̵̛̳̼̾͗̈͋̏̋̎̚̕͜͝ẗ̶̼̱̬͚͈̳̊͑̾̔̎̀̈́͘ ̶͚̘͎̲̗̳͖̖̗̝͓̰̝̄̇̒̍̿̆͐̈́͊͛̈́̓̚̕ͅẗ̴͔̪̖̣̠̺̻̬̟́̊͗̑͋̕̕ḫ̸̡͈̭͈̥̣̮̪̞̬̭̠̥͐̓̑̐̾̃̇̃͋̊͠ͅe̸̡̢̛̛̖̙̪͉̼̹̭̤̙̜̿̃̉̄̇̈̈́̔͛̈̾̓ͅ ̴̧͓̪̗̤͇͕̟̙̱͉̾́̔͒́́͂f̶̡͚̥̘̹̬̟͎͔̱̠̬̱̱͌͛̄̇̍u̴̧͚̳̯͈̤̻̹̘͙̜̩̭͎̐̅̑̈͛̎́͝n̷̬̘͇̳̳͖̈́͑̅͆͜͠ ̶̗͉͋̌̄̓͆̇͗͘̚b̸̡̻͓̠͌͂̓́̎͜e̵̛̗̮̽̒̿̿g̶̨̣̞͇̮̟̹̻͍̅̊̾͂͒͆̔̊͝ͅi̸̧͇̰̹̺̞̅̋͋̆̆̋̉̕͜͝͝n̸̛͚̤̭͖͙̻̄̑͊͗͌̓̈́͑͆̎̈͐͘͜.̶̢̢̧͕̰̪͎̩̖͙̫̥̯̄̑̆.̶̨̗͚̘͙̟͗̉̿̉̈́̍̃̀̈́̕.̴̨͚̤̖̙̱̥̲̺͓̩̥̲̦͑́̈̚"̶̢̛͎̝͍͎̂̊́̐̃̆͑̿͐͂͌̈͋͘**

He then vanishes himself away...there were several more 'actors' needed before this drama could unfold properly...

...

Ash was a bit embarrassed, according to the pamphlet...Aura required no interference between body and the world around him...which meant he had to do it naked.

Awkward as it was, it said that eventually one could perfect it so this would be unnecessary. Embarrassed, Ash found a quiet place out of town next a waterfall for him to train...perfectly isolated...

Ash smiled as the rock began to float. This was awesome! True, it was weird he was naked...but no one had to know, right?

He wouldn't know until years later that he was being spied on by one Serena...who would be hiding in the same bush watching Ash train naked everyday until she was forced to move to Kalos...

...Meanwhile...

Eddie Pryor, AKA Killbane, AKA 'The Walking Apocalypse' was confused...one moment he was being beaten in Hell by the saints...AGAIN...and then suddenly he was in charge of a crime syndicate that acted more like a softball team then criminals? Who named their team 'Rocket' anyway? What was that even supposed to mean? Did they sell rockets? Were they going to outer space? Were they aliens?

The lucahdore Mob boss never noticed the eldritch abomination gobbling up a confused Giovanni...

...

"Dr. Buttocks! Where are we?! Where's the netherworld!?" Screamed Lord Betrayus.

Dr. A.H. Buttock looked over his devices intrigued, "Interesting...it seems that all ghosts, monsters, resources, equipment, etc. of the Netherworld have been pulled into another dimension!"

"We'll get us back! I must conquer Packworld!" Screamed Betrayus.

"Now, my lord. Let's not be too hasty...we appear to be in a glittering tropical paradise." Pointed out Butt-ler. Betrayus looked around...and sure enough...the place they were in was drop-dead gorgeous!

"Oh, my. YES! Excellent! Glad I thought of it!" He then turns to the tow buttock brothers, "What are you morons standing around for!? Get my army situated! And get me a mango smoothie! And a hammock!"

Betrayus continued to bark orders as his ghost army started to spread out among the Orange islands...

...

**"̶͙͓̙͖̠̳̱͌I̴͙͚͕̗̗͐̋͑̋͂̕͘ ̵̱̲̺̙̤̥̠̮̱͈̪̋͗̔̾͝c̷̺͔͒̐͗͝͝a̴̛̲̤̮̠͑͌͗̐̔͝l̸̳̯͚̘̔͒̊̚̕l̷̤̣͉̳̾ ̶̨̡̡̛̲̻̝̳͖̹̰̫͔̋̈́͆̈̍̊̂͗͆̔̒͠u̵̻͖̣̺̤̦̮͖̝̻̘̘̙͚͜͝p̶̻͙̺͔̻̞͎͉͙̪̣͉͂͑̔͌͝͝ȏ̶̧̗̻̯̪̪̃͐n̷̢̨̛̽͗́̎͛̋̀͋̽̏͘̚͠͠ ̸̟͔̄̓̑̀̃̚y̶̧̢̼̓̈́̋̔̐̽̑̐̄͑̅́͝͠͝ǫ̶̧̢̛͓͚̬̫͔̝̳̣͈́͑͒̂̄̓̑̋̉͜u̶̯̰̙̞̥͒̈́̂̓̆͋͊͑͂̒ ̷̛̛̹̜̟̺͓̪͓̼̥̯͒͊͒̒̉̕͠z̷̛̼̥̬̲̞͈̥͚͓͑͌͐̌́̏͒̃̆ơ̵̛̥̺̱̪͎̺̲̗̤͗̀̎͋̅͑m̸̛̟͙̙̱͉͕͛̓̒̔̾̓̔̈́͗͂͆̌͘b̸͈͖͍̩͛̿͊̈́̽̌̋̇̈́̐͝͝i̴̩̙͙͉̝͕̱̳̿͋̿̅̽̋͆̓̅̆̕͝e̶͔̦̖͖̩̟͖̤͚̿̔͋̌̏͆̈́̿̑͝ͅs̷̡͚̝̩̫̳̗̗̱̪̿̒͗̾̈́̒͛́̃̇̈́̚͜,̴̡̲̩̳̬̱͙͕̹̀̎̂͗̎͑̈̆̈́̏̊̋̋͘ ̵̜͓̤͇͉͍̥̟͌͐̏͝ͅŗ̸̛͎̌̓̊͋̇͒́́̋͛̌͘̕i̶̖̝̼͚̒s̸̤̈́͆̓̈̓̚̕ē̴̬̜̱̤͓̪͂̆͗̿̓̚̕ ̴͈̈́͒ą̵͎̰͎̮̜̤̪͇̼͕͖̜͍̣̀̐b̴̻̾ở̸̡̠͚͔̦̹͓̙̣̪̘̣̩̄͌̆̋̇͌̅͋̒̚̕͝ͅv̵̡̯̗̠͖̠͑̉̓ę̵͙̙͍̈́̇̓̀͌̈́̋͘ ̵̢̛̘̣̖̺̾̇̊̅̔͗̑͛͗̔́t̵͓̻͉͙̬̰̿̀̃͋́̅̈͌̏̽͑́̏͝h̷̡̨̛̖͙̫͍̝̥͚͕̹̰͍̄͌͂̽̆̈́̑̎͐̒̑͝͝ę̷̢̼̼̞͚̟͙̗̯͚͈͕͖̠̉́͑̌̉̋̀̍ ̵̧̬̥̇́́͒͂͛͒̓̒̕͝ṡ̶͇̦̯̭̙͎͉̌́̇̂͠ì̴̜͓̠̥̺͕͇̗͙͇̙̰̜̗̕t̴̢̢̪͉̞̺̗͚̪̪͇̄̓̒̆͐͘͜u̸̼̥̼̭̝͚͚̥̣̙̦͍̱͐̀̄̀͒̈́̄͊̋ā̷̙̟͓̹̪͔́ͅt̴̢̟̪̫̥̺̺̠͇̓̔̊i̸͓̻̥̿̇̃̈͋͗̌͘ǫ̷̣̭̫̺̞̠̦͖͓͓̪̽́̊̿̾͗̔̆̚ͅņ̴̩̜̗̘͎͎͓͚̮̞͓͔̠͆ͅ,̸̧̡͔̜̺̯͕̗̩̟̝̲̪̱͙͂̆̓̐͊ ̷̡̬̙̤̌̂́ͅţ̴̹͙̲̖̹̬̣̭̮͆́̿̎́̿̍̂͘͜ͅą̴̛̻̥̙͔͇̪̗̺͚͇͚̼̘̝̎͊́k̸̡̧̼̺̗̞̱̩̞̭͎̯̑̈̌͐͂̒͒͊̇̄̚̚͝ę̶̢̛̬̺̻͍̗̜͔̹͇̫͓̗͑͠͝ ̶̨̛͙̺͙̘̅̏̔̏̆́̈͆͆̏̑̕͝t̷̗͓͇̲͖͓͔̆̅͋̓͘h̶̠̽̄́̑́͂͋į̸̨͔̣̩̟̗̔̓̈́͛̾͐̾̓̅̊͠s̶̮̱̮̉̌̽̂̃̔̈̋͐̌̑̚͝͠ͅ ̵̨̛̣̣͉͖ọ̵̡̧͍͙͇̖͚̜̳̪͒͛̈̋̕p̷̛̳̟̈́̃̓̈́̀̔̚p̵̠͚̠͚̯̽ỡ̵̧̛͉̗̲̖͚͚̺͙͂̓̽̉̑͌̎̈́̓̉͒̓͜r̷̨̖̖̰̣̙̪͌͒̄t̶̗̪̀͗́͗̀̒͑̅̚ư̶̢̯͎̩͎̊̌̈n̵̨͚̱̮̻̺̲̤͚̻̖̫̳͚̙͒͑̒̇̊̄͊̇ĩ̷̧̬͖͙̘̖̎͌̈́̇͠ͅt̶̛̘͕̹̺̞̻̦̠̯͕͖̼̙̮̏̈́͆͝ý̷̢̟̯̮̘̥͈͙͕̜͙͗̈̌̂̑̈́̈́͛͌̒̍̏ ̷̨̤̙̱͈͎̭̥͊̓͝a̴̛̲̪͖̗̟͉̗̠͇̟͈̯̙͂̌͊ͅn̵͔̟̠̰̱̖̓d̸̞̫͓̪̠̹͖̘̹͙̠̳̣̉̄͜ ̶̞̝͈͎̥̻͒͂̄̈́̓̈́͑̑͛͑͜f̷̢͚̜̤̟̞͚̫̮̼͑̽̏̈́u̴̫͍̇̂̏̉̓̎̌͐̽͊́̿l̶̰̟̦͙̰̠̙̗̼͍̔̅͑̀̍̅͜ͅf̶̯͓̩̩͔̺͕͎̼̹̱̗̰̱̉͊̽͆̋͌̿̅̇͗̎̇̚͘i̸̡̞̻̩̬̯̼͔͖̰̠̱͉͔̍͆͗l̵̘͗͂͑̀́̽̾͌͆̌͛̍͝l̵̙̂̔̑́͛̈́͊̋̌͝ ̵͓̔̚y̶̛̭̞̝̺̘̱͙͔̗̲̲̣̝̦̻̎͂̀̀̿̀̍̔̓̒̕̕̚̕o̵̡̢̨̲͕̼̤̹̣̮̖̰̔̃̋͋͊͆̓͊͐͆̕͜͝ư̵̻̭̙̼̠̱͖̱̺͚͔̥̺͙̍̑͂̏̄̅͂͝ͅr̷̡͇̖͙͍͚͉̥̹̫̣͆͋͆̏́̈́̔̕ ̴̛͔̟̤͐́̑͌̀͛̓͘d̴̰̩̬̦̖̲̻̲̺̞̥̹́̍̑̽̈͒͐͠e̵̛̛͚̭̠̫͙͍͓͈͖̱̺̳̖̽̋̆̈̀̎͠s̷̫̘̙͚͕̳̼̹̯̠̤͍͍͙̿̐̓t̴̨̢̙̤͉̙̠͋̔̔͌̑̉͊̿̄͝͝ͅͅi̵̧̢̨̱̘̭̟̫̦̪̱͍̇̿̈̀̏͋͌͐n̴̖͓̞͉̖͔̪̭̼̰͕̉̉̌͠y̵̜̌̀̏̅̐̍͂̈́͝!̸̢̤̱̣͙̤̤̤̮͕̝̯͈̯̳̐̾͛́͠"̶̖̪͓͚̟̥̰̼̯̗̰̆͂́̄̈́̔̇̑̒̑͘͜ **Exclamied Slenderman excitedly

Edgar Zomboss and his Zombie horde simply looked baffled, "So...no more plant-plant or Dave madness?" One asked confused.

Slenderman sighed, **"̸̢̥̹̯̹͎͈͈̏̾̀Y̷̢̪̩͓͎̥̳͑̾̍̾͛̇͆̈́̈́̆̋̑̅͒̕ę̶̧̯̤͙͈̎̎̈̉̎̈́̐͐͒͒͘͝ś̵̨̢̨̥͓̝̗͉̝̮̬̱̂̏̀͆̀̏͂͐,̷̧̝͎̪̜̖̥̃͜ ̶̡̦͍̫͚̠͋̂ṇ̷̛͍̗̖̼͑̿̓̃͊̂̈́͒̕͜͠͠ͅợ̶͈̬̰̲͕̲̩͙̼͔̤͗̓̆̀̂̑ ̶͍̦̘̠͇̪̦͍̭̬̩̩̈́́̓͐̑̓̈͋ͅm̴̙̱̺͈̑̓̍̇͐̃̍̊̂̕͠ͅo̶̤̯̺̺̤̥̜̒̿͐̀̅̇͝r̵̨̠̼͎̹̱͛̌͐͛͋̎̈́̋͂̅͘ͅë̵̤̠̰̙͖̯̞̟̠͔̟͔́͝ ̶͚͖̝͙̖̼̠͓̥̳̝̣̀̇̈͆̽̊̈́͋̌̕͜ͅp̷̜̞̻̦̈̌̈́̀l̴̛̬̹͈̉̃͒́͋͌̌̓͐͌̂̉̚͜͝ă̵̳͉̫̺͖̥̯̠̓͒̑̀̊͛̀͂̕ͅņ̵̦͙͈͔̯̺̾̽̃̀͑̑̃̆̅̂̕͠t̸̞̯̯̦͋̀-̴̡̨̟͖̟̝̖͓̲̣̮̣͎̋͒̄̓̈́̽͂̐̕͘͝ṕ̵̢̛͖̘̯̺̟̿̈́̾͐̐̾̃̕ļ̴͚͍̳͕̍͆̍̏̒͐̐̃̾͘͝ȧ̶̡̛͈̥̙̝̤͇̣͕͈͖͙̗̟͆̒̈́̊̅̀́͜ń̶̡̨͎̰͓̩̖̘̲͇̼̮͕̮͛͆̊t̷̘͉̭̘̼̦͇͔̞͔̪͔̗͈͚͂͂͋̉̕͝͝ ̸̡̧̢̛͈̺̝̼̙͖͕̫̖̼̼̈́͌͛̏̃̈̒̓̅̒͐͝ö̷̢͚̫͍̺̌̈͐̾͘̕ŗ̸͔̹̩̹͑͐̎ ̴͓̹̝̹̹̱̞͚̯̊̊̃̀̅̔͌͜͜ͅͅD̴̯̹͙͕͚͙͙͂͋͛ą̷̢̡̛̣̬̪͈͈̗̹̜͍͆̆̑͗̿̆̅́̒͌̈́̓̾͜͝v̵̫͈͉͇͉̥̌̉̓̄͛̑̋͐̓̍͋̌͌͘ẻ̵̛͉͂̐͒̈́́͗̿̀̉͛̃͝͠ ̶̡̬̺̹̟̞̲̠̅́̃͋́̉͊͜͜M̵͓̦̯̜͔͈̺͛̀͘á̷̧̨͖̥͈͎̗̞͇̹͂͋̂̍̿̓̈́͑͋̾̓̕͝d̷̰̳̜̭͆̓̾̿̎̌̌̾͑͠n̸̪̫̯̠̈́͌͜ḛ̷̡̨̢͕͚͉̤̞̽̊̒̍̔͋̑̽͜͠s̴̨̨̢̛͓̻̱̼̳̩̘͖̞͚̻͇̅̀̒̈́̆̒͂͗̈̌̓͌ṣ̵̢̢͗̀̽̋͝ͅͅ.̷̛̛̜̦͂̌̂̔͐̎̀ ̷̬͍̟͖͚̗̤́͑Ỳ̷̨̝͈͔̾̏̅ǫ̷̧̼̳̰̦̹̫̮̼̘͇͕̥̦̂͌̏̇̿͌̅̒u̵͍̺̱̺̳͕͉̙̙̦͛̀̂͂͜ ̸̝͋̊̏̓̊͒͝g̴̛̛͈͕̱̔͛̈̂͋̆̓̈̂́͆͝͝e̵̯̰̼̜̋̄͋̆͐̉̓̊̃ͅt̷͙̞̳̜̔ͅ ̷̧̢̢̛̼̤̯̻̪̩̰͈̳̥̙̇̾̌̅͜͝͝m̸̧̮͉͕̠͍̮͈͎̰̣͕̌ư̵̬̟̝̦͕̣͔̇̍͂̀͗̎̿̌̌̕͝ç̵̧̧̯̳̪͎̼̰̮͇̥͍͔̘̒̏͛́̃̚ĥ̶̛̛̺͇̤̹͛̓̈̌ ̵̢͚̹͗̈͗̈́̎̏̍͜͝b̶̡̢̜̞̗͕̳̼͇̫͗͌͊̃͒̚̚͝͠r̶̢̨͕̩͓̣̺̺͊̿a̷̼̣͇̣͇̼̠͎̱̺̘̪͍͈͒́̓͌̐i̵̡̢̢̛͓͕͉͗̇̓̿̔̀n̶͚͙͙͓̞̻̺̟̦̰̲͚̠̊͐͒̔̊̓̏̽̃̚͝ͅş̶̜̭̫̬͈̖̝̼͇͖̞̪͂̀̕͘ ̷̢͖̝̙͙͖̤̣̜͈̥̈́̽̑̂ḯ̵͍̇̐̋n̴̨̨͖͓͖̼͇͎̕͜ ̵̯̞̱͔̥̒͑̊̑̍̈́ͅţ̵̮͉̗͙̹̝͎̑́̄̌̽͂̃͆̚͜u̸̢̻̣̞̩̒͆̒̓̊̾́̋̾͛̓̚͘͠͝m̶̢̞̯̟̬̋̃̒̕͠-̴̛̠͖̬͋͗̂̅̽̍͒̓́͝͠t̶͎̳̼̞͓̲͙̫̠̀͐̾̀ͅu̷̡̨̬͖̮̟̦͔̻͓̙̝̓́m̶̧̡͉̜̬͖͖̪̜̭̞̻͋̊̎̽̍̾̔̑̇̊̍͒̈́̽̚ͅ.̶̖̻̝͚̰͕̣̑̈́̾̈́͛̀͒͗ͅ ̵̰̯̯̍̂͒̔̽̓͆̄̏͑͘̚͠͠͝Ą̷̺̺̹̹̻̟̤̯̠͒̇̈̓͌̀͑̓̓̕͠͠ͅͅń̴̡̲̘͔͜d̴̟̻͚͇͖̝͙̳̹͈̫͋̅̇̒̈̈́̈́̆͐̍͘ͅ ̸̡̯̥͓͓͔̪͇͔̈̅̿̀̇c̶̛̣̬̖͒̆͗̊̄͂͐͝ą̸̜͔̝̇̽͒̏̏̆̔͗̄͛͂̈́͊̕͜͝ṇ̴͍̗͔̯̠͓̰͓̂̓̚ ̵͍̤̪̱̂̿̋̿̂̀̅̍m̵̨̛̩̙̘͇͚̠̆̅̄̀̈͗͒̈́̀͘̚á̴̢̨̡̠̯͕̟͍̘̪̬̰͙̼̭ḱ̶̝͕̞̗͉̫̗͍̖̠̤̪̱̹̬̉͛́̒͠͝ẻ̶̢̧̢̘̼͚̙̣̻̰̪̔͌̀ͅ ̴̡̲̯͍̂̿̿̂̓͑̄͑̚͝͠á̸̡͙͇͇̦̯̟̥͚̾̈̈́̿̎̽͑̅̌͒̕͝s̶̡̮̯̟͙̺̹̭͓̪̳̩̯̲̎̒͑̿̒̿̉̄̽̍̽̾̇͑̀͜ ̷̧̱̬̯̟͛̀̔̉̃̈͐́͘͝m̷̧̖͓̙̜̘̰͖̫̬̘̥̰͑̕ͅͅu̶̡̻̦̞̞̞̩̫͗ç̸̰̮̻̻̘͚̝̦͖̂́͐͐̔̇͒̆͑̕̕̚͝ͅh̵̜̳̳̯̦̟̥̞̗͉̫̳̗̆̔͑̀̀̓̽̏̚ͅ ̸͙̣̗͕̀͑́̊̓̋͂͌͆̒͝b̸̢̬̹͎̙̱̬͈̔͝į̴͇̘̰̩̬̰̦̣̱̰̜͎͕̓͌́̔͐͒̓̈́͘͝͝͝ġ̴̢̥̺̠͇͚̝͚̮̞̮̙̅̾̄̄̿͒̍ ̸̺͔̳̜̦̭͈͙̓̅̃̈́͒̊̔͗̋̚̕B̶̡̡̢̲͙͈͔̽͊ȯ̵̢̞̥̦̙͉̝̳̳̤̗̙͕̪̮̅͆͝ǫ̷̧̲̼̬̩̹̰̭̤̇̂͗̅̆̍̐̓m̸̲̮̱̹̙̼̗͑̐̀̀̒͐̽̊͑͘͜͝ͅͅ-̸̨̙͉̞̟̺̓͜͜͝b̶̞̬̫͚̥͖̠͈̲͕̫͇̺̏͜ͅǫ̶͚̥̪̱̺̗̊͑̑̿̽̚o̷̖̖̫͕̰̺͂͛̉̊̀͠m̵̨̝̰͉̳̄̑͒̎̊̐̽̌̒ ̵̧̛̜̟̘͇̭͔̯͌́͆̉̋̄̉̿͘͝ͅǎ̵̜̝͙͖̙̤̤̳̏̆͊̌̌̆̂s̵̼͇͊̾̀́͗̚ ̵̭͚͎̪̙̻̩̟͔̟̤̑̎̊̌͑̿̋y̴̧̜̩̼͆̽̎͜o̵̢̧͎͕͚̼̹͍̘̭͇̼̹̼̾̈͋̓͛̍̑̊̀͒͑̄͑͆̕ͅú̴͈͕͓̥͖̫̝̣̄͘͜ ̵̮̙̞̙̰͔͔̝̖̥̤̘̭̼̉̽͌͐͘͘͠p̷̡̨̛̛̞͔̰̼͖̳͖͍͓̫͙̩̆̆̈́͊̏̐̕l̵̳̱̹̥͑̍̂̌̓̅̓̓̓͊̌̕͝e̵̞͎̬͖̙̰̜̫̗͎̠̹̔̔̍̎͒̇̈͘̚a̷̧͖̖̜̞̖̱̹̺͖͖̜̞͗̽̀̾̑́͌̀͒̽̑̀͝s̸̪͎̓̐́̀͊̑͘͘ȩ̴̣̫̞̠͙̼͂̊̅͌͆̇͌́́̊̐̍̉̐̚.̷̢͓̼̞͍̄͌̐͗͜"̶̨̜͎͔̫̦͈̜͛̓̍̉̊͝ **He said a touch annoyed.

All the Zombies gave a cheer as they began to shamble through the Johto Region...

...

Lord Dominator; the newly elected leader of Team Magma- Her campaign was successful mostly due to her running on the, 'This eldritch abomination ate your last boss, do you really want to risk ticking him off by NOT making me your new leader?' platform -took one look at their 'plan'...and set on fire with a dismissive snort.

"Yeah...were not doing that. Instead, let's have some fun!" She summons up her robot minions and her still terrified new magma minions, "Come on boys, let's BURN something!" She laughs as they march out to the unsuspecting Honen...

...

Meanwhile, also in Honen. The Demonic merman sorcerer Tritannus was cementing his rule over team Aqua.

"Run for it! His a madman! Run away! Run away- GAH!" Screamed an Aqua grunt right before he and all his buddies were turned into mutant mermaid zombies...

Tritannus laughed, a new world and a new empire to conquer! But first...

He looks over numerous canisters containing Garbodor's, Wheezing, and Muck's...

"Creatures that produce pollution naturally? I've hit the jackpot!" Laughs the insane sea mutant as he uses his trident to suck up the pollution and increase his power a hundred fold...

...

Darth Plagueis The Wise sipped some tea as he went over his predecessors plans. "Well, you were ambitious. I'll give you that. I would've loved to have chat with a fellow scholar in such matters." He says to the rotting corpse of Cyrus.

"However, I feel I must disagree with the 'erase the old world to make a new world' aspect of your plan...seems to me it would be far more simpler and less-time consuming to simply stay in the old and modify it to your whims. After all, you wouldn't tear down a half-built house if it was in good condition, would you?" He mused.

He takes another sip of his tea, and orders the terrified Galactic grunt to clean up the corpse...he had bigger things to attend to...

...

N screams as his 'sins' are carved out from his flesh . "Fear not my child...all will be well..." Assured Osmund Saddler, he turns to all the huddled and sobbing members of team Plasma, "All will be well for everyone..."

...

"What was chasing you in the park?...the park bench was chasing you?" Asked a confused Kalos Officer Jenny, she and all her sisters had suddenly became swamped as numerous call all across the region of people being terrified by ghostly apparitions...

"Boss! I just got a call from some dockworker down in Cyllage City." "what dose he want?" Asks Jenny annoyed.

"He says the Titanic just arrived..."

Meanwhile, two dock workers watch stunned as the wrecked frame of the infamous ship rises to the surface and let's out a swarm of ghostly passengers.

"...well...better late then never." Said one dockworker to the other...

Nearby a hot dog vendor gets slimed by a putrid flying blob of green slime...that then eats the entire cart whole...

...

Guzma screams as the giant, towering monster of a lady wearing a Noh mask covers him in darkness...he feels his body contort and twist...until he falls to the ground...a Nome...

Slenderman turns tot he cowering members of team Skull. **"̸̡̺̳͈̱̻̖̬͎̒̽̃̿̕͘S̴̡̧͈͈͖̍̿̾̐͒ͅo̸̧̟̟̦͕̠̙̫̰̼̝͕̳͚͆̒̀͋̓̾̐̋͘͘ ̴̘̻͉̼͘ẅ̶̗́̇̄ę̸̺̫̭̼̺̝̞̺̰̅͜͜ͅṙ̷̢̜̻̯͈̲͉͕̘̗͖̤̈͋͜͝͝ë̸̛̬̞̜̺́̓̉̽̓̌̓̑́͆̈͘͠ ̶̡̪͇̭̄̉͂̆̑̚a̸̧̢̰͎̱̪̭̼͈̺͙̻̜̘̪̓̎̔̐̍̿͛̂̀͝g̶̨̡̥̻̰̱̙̙͕͖̠̰̲̞͌̏̑̑̍̍̂̉͊͒̋̾̕͘͝ͅŕ̵͙͓͈̮̞̹͍͚͑̂̅̔̈́̈́͛̏é̸̬͕̪̖̰̱̞̟̩͉̇̆̅̉͒́̈́͗̈͋̐̕͘͝ͅe̵̬̞̖͉̝̜̬͎͙̋͜d̸͉̣̖͉̲̩̟̱̮̟̜̜̟̬̒ ̴̧̨͙͖̫͉̗̟̝̮̭͉̹͙̩̌̄͛̂͒̌̏͂̄͋̈́͗̕̚͝ẗ̷̙͙͔̣͇̺͔̍͛́͒̅̿̓ͅh̴̲̺̺̲͔͕̞̿̉͆͐̓̀̈́̾̓̚̚̚̕ͅȩ̴̯̬͉̪͑͊̈́̅̃̓̔̒̎̀̏ņ̵̧̛̫͍̣͖̘̓̋?̶͉̜̤̼́̊͐̊́͛͌̂̈̊̈́̕͝ ̸̣̤̼͕̹̣̫̬͍̀̅́͋͑̆̈́̃̑́̃͂̚Y̶̳͔̟̼̊̏̒̾̐̓͛̓̀͛͊́̕͝͠ͅȭ̵̡͉̳̜̥͇̟͙̣͍̪̪̤̊̉̓͊̀̐̃̔̋̚ͅũ̸̞̳͉̯͊͗̽̓́͛͘̕̚͠ ̵̧̢̳̰̒͠ͅś̷̨͖͔̩̬͙̗̖̊̌͒͌͛̔̐̄̈ë̶̢̙̭̗̘́͛̆͋͠r̶̡͈̝̥̞̼͖͆v̵̪̺͎͖͈͚̜̲̼͇̭̬̘̠̞̍̎̓̊̊͐͂͘̕e̶̛͖̰̙͇̬̲̽̽̋̋̿͋̂̿́̍̕͘ ̸̛̭̇̔̅̎͋̒͝ḩ̴̡̡̙̹͇͎͔̺̭̤̻͍͑̈́̋̂̊̾̐̐͗̅̃̈́̐̕ě̶̝̠̥̟͍̩̔̇͂̊́͌̍͠ṛ̵͓̘̼͖̮̪͇̹͕͈͇̗̝̺̋̆̀͆̆̓̀̅͌̀̆̚͠ ̴̧̼̱̘̜̟̖̳̞̞̳̳̲̝̀̅ç̶̮̞̮̰̝̬̃̎͜h̷̨̠͉̹͖̘̮̰̳̹͖͍̠̓̐̂͒͜ͅi̵̭̝̪͚̥̘͚͈̹̻̰̍͂̇͂͝ͅl̴͖͕͖̯͕̩̳͓͆̽̈́͒̅̒͂̔̉̇͘͠͝d̵̢̻̬̭̎͊̑̈́̋͆̓̇̅̂̈̔̇̕͜r̸̗̂̈́̿͆͌̽͆̌̒̊̄̒̕̚e̴̝̲͍͚̼͊̑̊̓͆͊̄̍̓͐̃͘͝n̷̬̘̝̗̠̣̉̓̑́̓̒͑͠ ̸̢̨̬͉͓̗͚͚̗̯̟̰͛͋̍̆͘ơ̴̡̳̪̰̺̓̀̈͒̈́̉͒͆͌̅̿͐ǹ̴̢̨̫̮̯̭͚͊͆̅̓͛͒̎͊́̕ͅ ̷̢̧̛̮͍̘̥̙̼͉̺̲̮͉͙̥̾̅͗̓͑̓̆͗́̈́̕͠͝a̵̡̧̢͙͍̯͙̻̳̅̾̔͗̕ͅ ̸̬̰̼̟̱̂͐́̓͂͛͗͑̈́̒̄̾̕͝p̴͖̈́͆͆̓̂́̋̀̓̽̈́̅̌͐͝ļ̴̡̨̞̰̮̻͎͕̰͇̣̜̣͖́̍ḁ̷̈͋ţ̵̡̛̟̼̙̖̲͉̌͑̒̇͗͂͋̏͐̽͜͝͝ͅt̷̛̪͇̼̖͑͆̌ȩ̸͓̙̟̭̣̫͓͉͕͆͑͒͑̉́͝r̴̛̩͒̓̐͛̌̈́̀͊̿̀̏͝ ̵̢̙̪͙̩̤̥̀͒̅ą̶̧͕̹̬̘͇͕̲̼͔̹̘̓̈́́̈́̎̈̀̒̓͛͒̕͘ͅn̶̛̤̩͓͓̼͗͊̎̇̋ͅd̷͇͓̜̟̮͈͙̞̻̙̹͇̅̊̃̄̍͋̕͜ ̸̧͙͍̭̐̈́̃̔͜s̴͔̐̈͛̒͘͝h̴͖͔͙̬̹̹͠ͅȩ̶̥̣͇̪͔͚̼͔̻̬͉̘͈̫͛͂͘̚ ̴̡̢̡̢̲̪͉̱̬̣͖̙̓̇̈͒͊̑͒̍̉͊͛͝͝d̷̡̨̞̰̝͓̬̻̱̾͌̎͝͠ȏ̴̱̈́̏̉̀̓͆̈́̚̕s̷̡̩͕͓̪͉͖̪̯͖̍̇̒̔̑̑̐́͌̄́̇́͠͠ͅe̴̬͙͇͔̟̾͛̀̐͝͝ṇ̷̛̱̜̮͓͕͓̤̽̅̄̿̍͂͗̀̃̎̂'̶̧̮̝͓̗̬̘͔͔͇͑͌̽̃͒̉̈́̏̂̂͂̈́t̵̜̼̀̃̇̏̚ ̷̪̲̦̘̹͖̪̣̒̏͝k̷̨͉͍͓̜͖̐̓̈́̑͗̈́̂̈́̎̽̈́̚ḯ̶̡̜̪̖͉̇̅̏̂͋́̒͑͠l̵̛͖͉̟̮̣̩̬̟̏́̿̍̔̍͒͗̾̾̒̚͠͝l̸̖͑̇͑̓͑͋̉̌͑̿͐͘ ̴̧̣̲̙͎̻̣͉͉̥͔͍̝͐̈́̔̃̃̂̚̚͠͝ẙ̶̬̹̪̫̖̣͌̂͗o̵̯͍͇̞̭͚̊͐͘u̷̡̨͎̱̞͍̠̠̮̹̓̾͗̃̏̐̍̋̚͝ ̷̯͉͉͈̲̫͍͕̟͍͒͂͆̑͗͋̋͝l̴̨̛̲̯̦̝̣̜̦̫̣̥͎̼̗͔͆͑̄̿͂͐̊̕̕ö̷̳̣́̋͆͊͌͌̌͑̍̃̈́ẗ̷͉̟͎͉͙̯̝̼͚̫́͐?̴̨̤̤̦̯̰̮̖̋"̶̨̜͔̦̦̲͍̃ͅͅ**

The Skulls were too busy pissing themselves to respond...

...2 years later...

DANG IT! I'M LATE! I'M LATE!

As Ash runs to Profesor Oaks lab, he finds himself briefly thinking back to his brief attempt of being an Aura user...Boy had that been a bust. True, he learned some pretty interesting tricks: Levitation, telekinesis, communicating with pokemon...but he could only do those powers when naked! This made them practically useless! He couldn't show them off to anyone, he couldn't show up Gary with them, and he certainly couldn't use them on his journey without risk of getting laughed at! So what was the point?

True, there were other techniques and exercises in the pamphlet...but they all looked really hard and boring...plus, thanks to the other reasons, he'd begun to lose interest by that point anyway...

He still kept the Pamphlet with him...if for no other reason then those freaky designs were fun to look at...

He then notices Gary celebrating with his fan club outside the front of the lab, Ash glared at that. Why dose he get all the cute girls?

Ash shrugged this off to focus, not wanting to deal with his rival's taunts right now he decides to sneak through the back...needless to say all the pokemon were already picked-

**ZAP!**

-Except for an ill-tempered Pickachu who seemed to have nothing better to do but zap him non-stop. After dragging the Pickachu out of Pallet and getting zapped for the 15th time...Ash had had ENOUGH.

"Dang it! What is your problem! I've barely left town and this trip is already falling apart! Why do you have to be so difficult?" Demanded Ash.

**ZAP!**

Ash gritted his teeth as he recovered and picked himself off the ground, "Dang it, this would be so much easier if we could just talk...it...out..." Ash trails of as he gets an idea...he didn't like it, but what other choice was there?

Quickly making sure that no one else was around and that this part of the woods was truly deserted...Ash began to strip...

Pickachu looked at the human as if he'd lost his mind as he soon stood completely naked- save for his hat and belt that held his money pouch, his aura pamphlet, Pokedex, and pokeballs -before her.

Ash took a deep breath and pulled out the pamphlet, "Right, I hope I remember how to do this..."

He technically had only done the 'pokemon telepathy' power once and by accident...on a nidoking...while he'd been mating with a nidoqueen...

Ash both learned about the birds and the bees AND was scared for life...he'd never used that power again...until now...

"Okay...here we go..." He summoned up his aura, _"Pikachu...can you understand me?" _Asks Ash mentally.

Pickachu looked at this naked human, stunned that he could communicate with her...there only seemed like one way to properly respond to this.

_"Your dick is tiny." _She commented smugly in her mind. She'd seen newborn Pi-chu's with bigger dongs then that!

Ash went very red...he was painfully aware of his...'shortcoming'(it had been the main reason for him quitting his aura training when learning to do it clothed proved futile). And having a clearly GIRL pokemon point that out was not helping things!

Pausing to cover himself...he continues, _"Look...could you explain to me why your acting this way? Why are you fighting against me?"_

Pickachu glared, _"I never asked to be a PET, I refuse to just blindly obey and be the servant of some human!"_

Ash frowned at that, _"Hold on, it's not like that...I was hoping we'd be friends." _

_"I don't believe you, I don't want to go with you, I just want to be free!" _Snapped the angry pokemon, her cheeks glowing with annoyed sparks.

...Ash sighed, _"Alright...fine then, I guess it wouldn't be right to force you to do anything you don't want to do."_ He states much to her surprise, he reaches down and takes off her collar. _"Your free to go, I guess." _

He sadly walks away while a stunned Pickachu watches...

Ash reaches down to pick up his clothes and backpack...only to see a bunch of Caterpie eating them! "Hey! Get off! That's mine!" He demands, the Caterpie flees...but the damage is done, all his clothes are now unusable scraps. Ash tries to fashion something from them...but they quickly fall to pieces...and all his supplies was now gobbled up

Ash groaned, "Great. No pokemon, no clothes, no FOOD...and I'm barely into hour 1 of my quest!...terrific, just terrific."

Ash sat down defeated...he'd wait for darkness...and then just streak home...what else could he do? "Shoot, Gary is going to have a field day with this...not to mention the few meager people who actually believed in me...and my mom..."

Ash couldn't help it...he began to sob. Pickachu looked upon this sadly, _"Maybe...maybe I can help him? Just once before I leave?" _She looks around, _"Hmmmm...a magicarp? No, those are too useless...a weedle?...nah, one helped me out with that aipom debacle... I can't put him through the same thing I'm trying to get away from...A pidgey! Those are just annoying, perfect!"_

She sends a bolt at it while also telling Ash to get his pokeball ready. However, this caused her concentration to lapse. Which caused her to miss the pidgey and instead hit a-

**ZAP!**

**KAA!**

...Spearow...

Pikachu paled, _"We need to run! NOW!" _She shouted as she did just that. Ash simply looked confused, up until he saw a swarm of Spearow answer their wounded comrades call. He was quickly running after her...

**KAA!**

A quick divebomb from a Spearow knocked both of them into a river, sweeping them up into the current...

...

Misty yawned as her fishing lure bobbed in the water...she'd been here all day and not a single bite...might be time to head to a different spot...

**SPLASH!**

She got a nibble! And it was a big one! Excited, she pulled with all her might-

**SPLASH!**

And out flops a naked kid and a pikachu! Ash groaned but coughed out some water. "Thanks, I was really- Then his eye's went wide as he sees the situation...namely there was a cute girl here...and he was naked...

...A cute girl who seemed a mixture of flustered and enraged!?

**PERVERT!**

Before Ash could even flinch, she'd drop kicked him right in the crotch...and again...and again...and again, again, again, again, again-

HOW DARE YOU-

**STOMP!**

-A LADY LIKE ME-

**STOMP!**

-YOU NASTY, DISGUSTING, UGLY BOY-

**STOMP!**

-GET ENOUGH SICK KICKS-

**STOMP!**

-YOU HAVE SOME NERVE-

**STOMP!**

-BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF-

**STOMP!**

-SO HELP ME ARCEUS IF YOU DID ANYTHING UNSAVORY TO THAT PICKACHU-

**STOMP!**

****STOMP!****

******STOMP!******

Pickachu also coughs up some water, she looks to see Misty repeatedly mash Ash's groin to paste. Pickachu, horrified by this and knowing they have little time before the Spearow flock shows up. Is forced to take drastic action-

**ZAP!**

**GAH!**

Screamed Misty as she was shocked, Pickachu tries to get Ash up but...ash is in too much pain, he has no feeling below his waist...Seeing the Spearow show up, Ash quickly grabs a surprised Pickachu and covers her with his body. Taking the full brunt of the attack.

Misty wakes up just in time to see Ash's back get torn to shreds by the Spearow...blood was pouring into the grass...

Misty frantically turned to run for her pokeballs-

**SQUAWK!**

**GAH!**

Screamed Misty as a Fearow grabs her by her suspenders and carries her away! "WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS!?" And then she remembers how she'd horribly injured the boy who was currently risking his life to protect his pokemon...

She sighed, "Okay, on second thought...I might deserve this..." She then continues her screaming...

...

Pickachu could take no more, this human was about to die saving her! She dug deep, deeper then she'd ever dug-

**CHUUUUUUUUU!**

**ZAP!**

The blast was so intense, everything around them was destroyed, including the Spearow. Ash wimpered as he tried to stand...but all could manage was a crawl..he hugs Pickachu. "Thank you Pickachu."

Pickachu smiles, _"Your welcome...Ash." _She responds as she hugs back.

Most of the girls stuff had been totaled, but there was enough to make bandages and treat his wounds. Using a large stick to steady himself, they limp in the direction the girl had been taken...

...

The last couple minutes had not been great for Misty, first her suspenders snapped while being carried by the Fearow, causing her to fall and rack herself on a tree branch.

While she was busy clutching her crotch in pain...she slips off the branch-

**RIP!**

And her shirt gets snagged and ripped off by said branch as she falls off, quickly she reorients herself and grabs another branch to keep from falling. She gives a sigh of relief, as the branch holds. But then watches helplessly as her no longer suspended shorts slide off her legs...and are carried off by the wind.

Fortunately, Misty allows wears her bikini beneath her clothes instead of traditional underwear. So although it would be a little awkward to walk around like this, it was better then the altern-

**KAA!**

Misty screamed as the Fearow began to attack her yet again, "GAH! HELP! SOMEBODY! ANYBODY! HELP!"

**CHUU!**

**ZAP!**

The Fearow is hit hard by a thunderbolt, it gives one last squawk before it's singed wings cause it to plummet like a stone, frantically clawing at anything to grab onto-

**RIP!**

In this case, Misty's bikini...and padding...

"Oh, come on!" Shouted an annoyed Misty as her womanhood and rather subpar chest-

**CRACK!**

-Right before the branch broke. for a moment Misty screamed as she fell through the air...then like that...she slowed down...and a weird blue glow surrounded her...

"What the- To her surprise, she floated into that boy from earlier's arms. Ash chuckled, "Man, am I glad I kept that pamphlet to remind how to do Telekinesis!" He exclaimed happily.

Misty excitedly hugged him and thanked him for saving her...and then they remembered they were both naked...courtesy of Misty's chest being accidentally pressed against his face...the two just stared at each other in awkward silence...

They almost missed the sight of the Ho-Ho that flew over them...

…III...

TO BE CONTINUED?

**AN: Want me to continue this? I'm willing to take Bribes! Go to my P,a,t,r,e,o,n account!**

**Love me, flame me, review me**


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